Speak Up!

Many I talk to feel American business is loosing its completive edge because employees tiptoe around issues and management discourages healthy debate. In an effort to avoid the negative consequences of conflict and to be overly sensitive to others’ feelings we’ve become a nation a risk-avoiders, less a country of bold-innovators.  

My nephew’s wife, Netu worked for a large financial firm in India. At her job in Delhi she tells of real teamwork, dynamic and open communication and the debate of ideas; values that often make their way to U.S. company mission statements, yet elusive to day-to-day behavior. 

Netu recently was relocated to the firm’s Phoenix office, and the difference in open communication between the two locations was quite apparent.   At the Arizona location employees defused issues and got reprimanded for unpopular ideas. In the Delhi location, team members confidently shared unpopular ideas and comments were not taken personally. 

Not all U.S. businesses have become regressive in communication. But in general, we are in an era of avoidance.  Certainly the scarcity of jobs, the fear of being sued, and stricter financial accountability has added fuel to the fire.  But there’s one skill we need to adopt that will help improve trust, open communicate and encourage innovation: Separate facts from fiction. 

Let me explain: If a stenographer followed us through our day he or she would record the facts: What was said, what was done, by whom and when. For example, your boss wants to see you in her office. That’s a fact. “I must be in trouble”, or “I wonder if I got the raise”. Those are interpretations. We also create interpretations about other people and their intentions.  “Bob obviously doesn't care about this project because he is late for the meeting”.  What hurts business and personal relationships is when we act on our interpretations without verifying if they are accurate.  In this example maybe we stop taking Bob’s ideas seriously because of our unverified interpretations. And when a whole team, department or company acts on unverified interpretations what you get is a lot of silent people in dysfunctional relationships, slowing progress down.

Recently I worked with a team to combat their fear to communicate by developing the following three principles:

We won’t assume what we can’t confirm.  We’ll give people the benefit of the doubt. We’ll not gossip nor form an opinion until we can understand the intentions of the person involved.

We’ll be responsible to our interpretations.  In a conflict we’ll share our interpretation on what was said or done.  “When you didn’t respond to my email I created the interpretation that you thought my idea was dump”. 

Feedback and ideas are not seen nor given as a personal attack.  All ideas and concerns are welcomed. 

When we stop assuming how others feel and start owning the interpretations we create, trust can be restored. And when there’s trust, it’s safe to share the crazy idea or discuss the un-discussed.  If we’re going to thrive, not just survive into the 21st Century, we must speak up a lot more and business leaders must model the commonly held value of open communication.